Patch

In the morn to our own church, where Mr. Mills did begin to nibble at the Common Prayer by saying 'Glory be to the Father,' &c., after he had read the two psalms: but the people had been so little used to it, that they could not tell what to answer. My wife seemed very pretty today, it being the first time I had given her leave to wear a black patch.

Samuel Pepys
Diary entry
November 4, 1660

The wind has stopped, but the chill will descend upon the day one way or another. It's the season. I have been doing a lot of leisure reading on the computer screen. This drains me, probably even the people around me. The justification exists: no reading is leisure in my line of work, each page is necessary. It's thin, but I subscribe to it. I have no alternative to distraction. The child called for me, my wife had just reported. But I heard it. I shall watch the child deal with the bottle.

Downspout

To give me something new to begin with as well, Daddy askeed Koophuis for a children's Bible so that I could find out something about the New Testament at last. "Do you want to give Anne a Bible for Chanuka?" asked Margot, somewhat perturbed. "Yes--er, I think St. Nicholas Day is a better occasion," answered Daddy; "Jesus just doesn't go with Chanuka."

Anne Frank
Diary entry
November 3, 1943

Lights are on again after most of the weekend dependent on candles. The semestral break has come to a close. It was much too brief for me, but I got to clean the gutters. Mae and Dad left yesterday. We sent Ate off before lunchtime. The child said her Ninang's name 4 hours after she left.

Comfort

The Weepies

When everyone has gone to sleep
and you are wide awake
there's no one left to tell your troubles to.
Just an hour ago, you listened to their voices
lilting like a river over underground
and the light from downstairs
came up soft like daybreak
dimly as the heartache of a lonely child.

If you can't remember a better time
you can have mine, little one.
In days to come when your heart feels undone
may you always find an open hand
and take comfort wherever you can.

And oh, it's a strange place.
And oh, everyone with a different face
but just like you thought
when you stopped here to linger
we're only as separate as your little fingers.

So cry, why not? we all do
then turn to one you love
and smile a smile that lights up all the room.
Follow your dreams in through every out-door
it seems that's what we're here for.

And when you can't remember a better time
you can have mine, little one.
In days to come when your heart feels undone
may you always find an open hand
and take comfort, there is comfort.
Take comfort wherever you can, you can, you can.

Diamond Sea

Sonic Youth

time takes its crazy toll
and how does your mirror grow
you better watch yourself when you jump into it
'cause the mirror's gonna steal your soul

I wonder how it came to be my friend
that someone just like you has come again
you'll never, never know how close you came
until you fall in love with the diamond rain

throw all his trash away
look out he's here to stay
your mirror's gonna crack when he breaks into it
and you'll never never be the same

look into his eyes and you can see
why all the little kids are dressed in dreams
I wonder how he's gonna make it back
when he sees that you just know it's make-believe

blood crystalized as sand
and now I hope you'll understand
you reflected into his looking glass soul
and now the mirror is your only friend

look into his eyes and you will see
that men are not alone on the diamond sea
sail into the heart of the lonely storm
and tell her that you'll love her eternally

time takes its crazy toll
mirror fallin' off the wall
you better look out for the looking glass girl
'cause she's gonna take you for a fall

look into his eyes and you shall see
why everything is quiet and nothing's free
I wonder how he's gonna make her smile
when love is running wild on the diamond sea

Who's Next?

You were frank. What a lovely and liberating thing to be. Maybe you were also cruel, but I never stood too close to notice. Candor was the stuff of entertainment, but also of dismay. There's no point in giving gifts to you now, but yes I did love those hands more when they were warm with color. Instead I took a gift in your name, entered you or my approximation of you, tried my darnedest to become you: What would you say if you were in my place?

It seemed to me you would ask a question. One question.

Possibly, you would never come to this question. You would never be in my place. Or, you have ceased coming to questions. But the question is here, before me, whole like a softball or a nut. I'm not certain which of us owns it.

Neveretheless, I understand how I belong to this particular question. Goodbye, you.

Pasyonasyon

My poem's on a CCP wall as part of Irma Lacorte's installation art. The collective title is Tore : Bangin :: Bahaghari. Go see.

Bulwagang Juan Luna (Main Gallery), Cultural Center of the Philippines. Exhibit runs from May 14 – June 21, 2009. Below, the exhibit notes lifted from the e-mails:

The project "PasyoNasyon" descends from lessons conceived, learned and acquired in a cultural sense from WOMAN as (MYTHICAL) HERO:BABAYE- BABAYLAN- BAGANIHAN, a major KASIBULAN project concluded last July 2008 sponsored by NCCA.

PASYONASYON is an attempt to concretize and materialize concepts and ideas that revolve around the cultural history of the Philippines as seen through oral traditions (such as pasyon, babaylan, rituals, etc.) as such traditions are carried forth by women as primary figures of these rituals.

PASYONASYON will showcase wearable art in various art forms and media. It will serve as the converging point of different art practitioners from diverse art disciplines (dance, music, visual and digital arts, performance art and literature) to come up with provocative images, sounds, performances, and choreography that will be stringed in an exhibit at the CCP Main Gallery from May 14 to June 21.

Participating artists: Aba Lluch Dalena, AJ Tolentino, AK Domingo, Alma Quinto, Amihan Jumalon, Baidy Mendoza, Brenda Fajardo, Cecil De Leon-Laya, Ceej Gomera, Chato Rivero, Christine Sioco, Claire Zapata, Con Cabrera, Cynthia Alexander, Daphne Aguilar, Dina Gadia, Edda Amonoy, Elaine Lopez-Clemente, Esther Garcia, Gigi Javier-Alfonso, Irma Lacorte, Jana Jumalon-Alano, Jane Ebarle, Jen Viola, Katrina Ann Tan, Kiri Lluch Dalena, Lia Torralba, Lita Maderazo, Lorna Fernandez, Lot Arboleda, Maan de Loyola, Maria Villanueva, Mayuko S. Kobayashi, Milk Mendoza, Mimi Tecson, Mona Dela Cruz-Gaston, Nadya Melina David, Nina Libatique, Norma Liongoren, Paz Abad Santos, Pusong Bughaw, Racquel de Loyola, Rona Fernandez, Rosel Valenzuela, Serena Borras, Susan Fetalvero-Roces, Teya Tan, Vivian N. Limpin, Zenaida Xavier.

Sunshower

Chris Cornell

Dark as roses, fine as sand
Feel your healing and your sting again
I hear you laughing and my soul is saved
On forgotten graves you cry

Crawl like ivy up my spine
Through my nerves and into my eyes
Cuts like anguish
Or recollections of better days gone by

But it's all right
When you're caught in pain
And you feel the rain come down
It's all right
When you find your way
Then you see it disappear
It's all right
Though your gardens grey
I know all your graces
Someday will flower
In the sweet sunshower

Eyes like oceans so far away
A feather trail to a better way
Worried mornings turn into days
Then into worried nights

But it's all right
When you're all in pain
And you feel the rain come down
Oh it's all right
When you find your way
Then you see it disappear
Oh it's all right
Though your gardens grey
I know all your graces
Someday will flower
Oh in the sweet sunshower
Oh in the sweet sunshower
In the sweet sunshower

I know all your graces
Someday will flower
In the sweet sunshower
And it's all right
All you'll be you are today
Are today
It's all right
All you'll be you are today
Are today...