Peb 16, 2002





Uh, OK. Why do I always end up with the same results as the other people I read? For example, this one's from Frances. And this other one is from Lisa.




Maybe we're all just bored? Hehe. Anyway I've been thinking of updating my links page. Or at least comment here on some new sites I've been following. Tsk tsk. The quick brown fox jumps over the damn lazy dog.
At last it is over! The car is sold and my time deposit's monthly interest will probably give me more money than my part-time job! Whew! For now, I won't mind a vacation from all that. And Baguio is just a week away. The Company has changed, but the mission stays the same. Stop and smell them flowers!

I must remember to be grateful for that boost. It would be a bit easier to make a start now, I guess. It came at a good time.

Books Queued for Reading:

  • Pingkian by Lamberto Antonio
  • Edad-Medya by Jose Lacaba
  • Krisis at Rebolusyong Pilipino by Jose Ma. Sison
  • Gabay sa Tunay na Unyonismo
  • Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkien


I wish I were a speed reader. I wonder if I'll have any time left to create my NGO's brochure? I'm pretty laid back right now and, whether I like it or not, work will find a way of catching up with me.

No matter. These things will be dealt with.

Well, I had a blast in the UP Fair last night, February 15, but it was mainly because of the company (Hello!), not the fair itself. It would have been much more fun if Belle told me she was there (were you in a blue shirt?)! And because I was not too uptight with the dough as I usually am.

I didn't like the way the master of ceremonies handled the show. I didn't like the show much either. Except for the Kontra-Gapi performances of course (or Reg will kill me). And the caterpillar didn't have proper panelling at the sides. If you sat on the left side, your ribs would be crushed by the unpanelled frame. If you sat on the right, you would crush the other set of ribs of your seatmate.

In the end, it was the reminiscing that mattered, right Irish? Yup, those were the days.

I couldn't stay long enough for Barbie's Cradle, Razorback or Slapshock. I had to catch up with my eldest sister and our "little" brother (who's beginning to dwarf the both of us) at Chili's. No sense telling himd about the birds and the bees, he may even know more than you do ate! Hehe.

My sister said the corn on the cob tasted much like my iced tea. I hated it too. I had bottomless iced tea and bottomless chips and salsa. Rare treat. Strangely, I enjoyed this one dish we shared. Half-rack of baby back ribs.

Peb 14, 2002

Happy Valentine's Day! Happy Teacher's Day too! I love you all! And one little teacher in particular! (",)

Peb 12, 2002

BUSINESS, AS USUAL

As I make my unusual path among the unusual paths trodden by unusual men, I have made it clear to myself that I can live without two usual processes: the driving of cars and the engagement in sales.

I have nothing against either, truth be told. I just never got along to dreaming along those lines. I was segurista. My elder sister says that makes me a lousy bussinessman and a good writer. (She's my beloved sister, so any flattery from her is golden!) I'm no good at taking risks. I don't love the fast lane.

Having such a path that I would liken to no other man's (as no other man would like to liken their paths to most any other man), I find almost every turn quite surprising. Just now, despite all my leanings, I have to sell this AUV that fate so benevolently bestowed on me. But BIR would not smile at me as fate did unless I gave the prize's 20% tax.

My first thought was to sell it. They cautioned loan, I said "Hell no!" I won't be paying for that prize for the remainder of my so-called youth! Besides, all those kids would just etch their names on that rust-proof finish before I get near to getting a garage (or my own house for that matter). Who would care for an AUV with a roll call of the barangay children (and the drunk elders who just happened to have their tansan handy)?

Nope! We had a third (or was it fourth?) -hand car once. And I've gone through the veritable Hell of pushing it when it was stuck on the uphill side of the Ortigas fly-over. All those hoots from unair-conditioned buses, all those peekers who managed to roll down their windows and stare even at high-speeds, and all that black smoke reminding you that it's really not healthy to be exerting a lot of effort and breathing too deeply in that part of town.

Pleasant. Yeah. I really loved cars after that. Besides, I'll miss all my fellow-commuters who just don't give a damn about you but think that everybody else gives a damn about them and try to sit so inconspicuously just so we can all go on staring.

Anyway. I'm in a world that I really don't care for. These buyers and agents trying to get the better of you, I tell you, in this business, you have to exert so much just to stand your ground! Very cutthroat. I don't regret winning though because it gives me something interesting to post. But I damn well hate having to hustle while in the middle of food or sleep.

Nope. Not the fast lane for me.

So I devoted a good part of the expected proceeds to agents. One such branch of my little network had a grand total of six! Yes! Just one buyer and I get six agents! And it's barely amusing how they organized themselves. They require me to brief all of them separately! And when after acquiescing and wasting precious phone load on informing everybody, one still manages to misinform one of the others. So I get up to the sound of my generic 5110 ringing tone in the not-so-dead-anymore-Dead of night wishing it was someone who loves me.

But that agent, who is four decades my senior and subtly reminds me of that fact at every intonation, barely loves me. No, I'm not the prospective source of his money. I am between him and his thousands. The bull doesn't cherish the fence.

You just want to shout to your agent, "Hey! Which side are you on anyway?" And I did just that over the phone (just because I was having so much fun). And I was waiting for him to say "Huh?" But no, the just elder replied after a moment's consideration, "I'm on the side of what is right."

And I thought, "Huh?"

Well, if you have my URL, you'll read here and know, elder agent. You're not going to get to your little green pasture that way! No bull.

Anyway, It's a ball really. I can understand why people could really base their lives on something like this. It's fun. It's perversely pleasurable getting on top of things. And taking control, as I have found myself capable of doing in this once-alien field. It's like debate. Only here, even the subtlest sophistries count. So you have to keep your eye on the ball without trimming the peripheral vision. People can really get to love and admire this stuff especially if they have the proper set of norms, values, and motivation. Conditioning, in short. You must want it to get it.

Even though, despite all the chicken soup and inspirational "diet-coke" books they sell to make some dough on people's frustrations, the majority who want even the most basic things, do not get. But these would comprise another article. For now, on business, I could perfectly understand why even an entire world could be based on something like this.

And why some men might want to walk, or at least dream, of an unusual path.

***

Astig ang aking kapalaran ayon sa Inquirer Libre. Para sa lahat ng MRT riders (sarap magkomyut!), gumising kayo ng maaga para maabutan nyo ang kopya nyo! Pinag-aagawan naming magkakapatid iyan sa bahay. Laluna ang horoscope section. Sa araw na ito, hindi namin napunit ang isyu. Heto ang para sa akin:

Trabaho: Iwasang mapagod, mahirap magkasakit.
Pera: Pagkakakitaan mo yang videoke voice mo.
Pag-ibig: Merong may crush sa iyong kapre.

Oy! Piscean! Hetong sa'yo:


Trabaho: Magpapayat ka muna bago mag-dancer.
Pera: Huwag padadala sa kantiyaw ng barkada.
Pag-ibig: Pinapawisan ka sa ilong: seloso!

O ayan, verbatim iyan. Kung di kayo magising ng maaga, sabihin nyo lang ang zodiac sign nyo para mailathala ko rito sakaling may maabutang kopya na hindi punit ang seksyon para sa kapalaran.

Piscean, bakit sa iyo sila nangangantyaw? Baka nga mapilitan kang mag-dancer nyan. May ipapayat ka pa ba? Sasayaw ka ba to-the-tune ng aking videoke-voice?

Selosa ka raw. Inggit ka dahil may me crush sa aking balbon ano?


***

Ipinasa ko ang artikulong ito sa Tinig ilang araw bago ang kontrobersyal na pagpapamalas ng nakaksilaw na IQ ni Gloria at hinati niya ang mga Pinoy sa Terorista ayon sa mga interes ng Estados Unidos. Ilalagay ko narin ito rito. Pero palabas na ang isyu ng Tinig at ipapaalam ko na lang kapag mababasa ninyo ang mga mas maganda at masustansyang panunulat ng mga kasamahan ko ruon.


TAPATANG KANO AT ABU


I. DEBATE

Ipinagtapat sa isang palabas kamakailan ng DEBATE nina "Mare at Pare" ang mga Amerikanong sundalo at ang tropang Abu Sayyaf. Ihinain ito bilang pangunahing tanong: "Kanino ka mas natatakot, sa mga Amerikano o sa Abu Sayyaf?" Doon ako natakot sa mga implikasyon ng ganyang pagtatanong.

Fan ako kung sa fan ng DEBATE. Napopopularisa nito hindi lamang ang mga isyu kundi mismong pagtindig ng mga Pinoy para sa kanilang mga prinsipyo. Napagtatapat nito ng maayos ang mga kalahok sa tulong ng mga gabay na katanungan upang maisaayos ang pagluwal sa mga punto at kontrapuntong kumakatawan sa isang isyu. At nailalahok nito ang mamamayan sa tulong ng mga makabagong paraan ng paghahatid ng feedback. May botohan pa at tally na sadyang mas natutukan ng sambayanan kaysa anumang ilabas ng SWS. Nagamit nang husto nina Mareng Winnie at Pareng Oka ang mga oportunidad ng midyum para sa benepisyo ng kamalayang Pilipino.

Pero bakit ganuon na lamang ang pagtatapat sa mga Kano at Abu? Sa pagtatanong pa lamang, tila may pamumusisyon nang nangyari sa kabila ng pagka"neutral" na nais ipakita sa pamamagitna nina Mare at Pare sa estudyo.

Baka naging primaryang konsiderasyon lang talaga na makaengganyo ng mga manonood sa gabing iyon. Siguro nga talagang kailangang hakutin ang mga tao para punuin ang mga telemessage center, e-mailbox, at cellphone inbox ng programa. Pero anuman ang dahilan, namrublema talaga ako sa indikasyon ng ganitong tanong sa ating panlipunang diskurso. Gagamitin natin ang pagtatapat na ginawa ng katanungang ito para sa ating benepisyo rin.


II. POLARISASYON

Saan ba tayo nais i-"lead" ng "question" na ito? Nagkakaroon ng mapanlinlang na paghahati ng mga mamamayan. Mga mas takot sa Kano at mas takot sa Abu. May lugar ba para sa matindi ang takot sa dalawa? Kaugma nito ang "bi-polarization" na isinasagawa ngayon ng Estados Unidos.

Ang polarisasyong ito ay klasikal na metodo ng digma. Mithi nito ang paghatak sa mga mamamayan sa isang panig. Iniitiman ang "kalaban" para lumabas ang pagkaputi ng "bida." Walang lugar para sa mga in-betweener. Para ka sa "katarungan" o kalaban ka nito. Maraming nagiging mapanganib na simplipikasyon at heneralisasyon dahil sa taktikang ito.

Dalawa ang "di-makatarungang" anak ng ganitong pag-iisip. Una, hindi na nabubusisi pa ang mga ugat ng pag-aaway. Basta mali ang isa, siya ang nanguna at tanging may-sala. Paano halimbawa, kung may papel naman talaga ang nagpapakabidang panig sa pag-usbong ng pagngangalit ng kabila?

Ikalawa, nagiging matuwid ang anumang isagawa ng bida. Nakukuha niya ang lahat ng suporta. Minimum ang mga katanungan at kritisismo sa kanyang mga ikinikilos at obhetiba. Kung magtaas ka ng kamay o kilay at pinansin ka, sapat nang sabihing detrimental ang iyong pag-iisip sa "common cause." Kaya mapag-iinitan ka ng mayoryang naengganyo sa kanyang panig.


III. INTERES

Pero sa kasong ito, mapasa-Al Qaeda o Abu Sayyaf, may papel na ginampanan ang EU sa kanilang genesis. Ngayon, sa kabig ng pansariling interes itinapat niyo ang sarili nito bilang kalaban ng terorismo at tanggulan ng demokrasya.

At ito naman talaga ang usapin dito. Bakit ipinagtatapat ang mga Kano at Abu na para tayong pinagtatalaga ng isang necessary evil? Porke ba may sarili tayong kinikilalang mukha ng terorismo, lohikal na sumusunod na may papel na ang mga Kano sa bansa natin. Interes lamang naman talaga nila ang kanilang kinikilala simula't sapul pa lamang ng kanilang unang pekeng "pagligtas" nila sa atin mula sa Espanya. Mula sa mga Hapon sa pamamagitan ng tropa ni MacArthur. Mula sa ating "kamangmangan" sa pamamagitan ng giyera, Thomasites, at Commonwealth.

Bakit ipantatapat ang mga Kano sa Abu? Yaon ang dapat katakutan! Lumaki ang problemang Abu dahil sa maling pamamrayoridad ng gubyerno, pakikipagsabwatan ng mga lokal na opisyal, at maling diskarte ng militar. Matakot tayo na para solusyunan ang problema, itinatalaga ang mga Kano bilang "natural" na katapat ng Abu at sa proseso, mas malaking problema para sa hinaharap ang pinapasok natin.

Tinagurian nilang "Balikatan" ang ehersisyo ng mga Kano at Pinoy sa ilalim ng katraydurang kasunduan na VFA. Nasayang ang kagandahan ng salita na nakalaan sana para sa tunay na pagkakaibigan at pagkakapatid ng mga Pinoy. Ginagamit ito ngayon para pagandahin ang imahe ng Kano kasama ang Pinoy. Ngunit ang tunay na imahe ay ang panibagong krus, gawa sa antigong kahoy, na ipinapatong sa balikat natin.

Peb 10, 2002

USAPING HALO-HALO ULI

Lumabas na pala ang aking ikasiyam na artikulo sa Peyups.com. Salamat sa mga editor! Kaya ko binibilang kasi hanggang sampu lang ang plano ko. Pero sa totoo lang, hindi ko rin alam na ilalathala ang isang ito. Natagalan kasi sa paglabas e. Nauna pa yung isa. Siguro tinataymingan rin nilang wala na sa uso ang Nokia 3310.

Huh? Wala bang konek? Meron yan!

Heto ang walang konek. Nakapag-apply na rin ako sa wishlist ng Amazon.com sa wakas. Maglagay kaya ako ng shipping addy? Baka sakaling may magtrip, hehe. Sarap nito kung magkataon!

Ngayon at napag-uusapan na rin ang kape (opo, paraphernalia para sa kape ang nasa wishlist na iyan!), dumako naman tayo sa halo-halo (huh?). Ngayon at may ice shaver na kayo, ang susunod na prerekisito sa espesyal na halo-halo ay ang tinatawag nating "pinipig." Yun!

O di ba? Hindi na kailangan ng eksplanasyon. Pinipig. Amen. Sarap!

Pero tutal may pinipig na, bawas-bawasan na ang asukal. May angking tamis na naman iyan e. Tapos may iba pa namang halo tulad ng leche flan, ube at saba na may kanya-kanyang tamis. Gatas na lang ang idagdag. Kung trip talaga ang sobrang tamis, kondensada.

Baka masanay ako sa halo-halong pagsusulat! Pati yung bago kong mga ka-E-grupo sa Tinig.com, nadala na rin sa pagkain ang usapan!

Peb 7, 2002

Through all this, you are everpresent. and I wonder what I have done to deserve the honor.

You move amid the gnawing thought, cold fear, and dark anger that I am usually allied with. These are grim times for me, migraines and eye strains attend me. But you are always there, unbitter pill, warm eye drop. You are as inevitable as the onset of sleep to all thoughts, the falling of the eyelid.

Through all this, you are my companion. You are lovely but I have not shown you much deference. Because beyond the migraine and eye strain, I am profoundly foolish and blind. Yet, in all your states - vapor, thought, fire, ice, liquid, flesh, and dream - you embrace me.

And there, there and nowhere else, as I am thus encompassed, I understand my folly and see my blindness.

I behold you and I know something in the world is right. Although I cannot reconcile how the song can co-exist with the mad din that is the world. But I know there is reason yet to live. The very same reason I can die for someday.

I see you and I know that something in the world is perfect. But I wonder why I am so blessed. I have done nothing to deserve the honor.

***
Reading: Tolkien's "The Two Towers" and Rousseau's "Meditations of a Solitary Walker"

Craving: for Caesar's salad, Inihaw na Liempo, and Ponstan 500.

Thinking: that I am a lucky, undeserving bastard.

Feeling: like a cat on a hot tin roof...

...of a birdcage on a very high pole.

Peb 5, 2002

In Pace Requiescat. Wala akong tiwala sa Latin. Pero ito nga siguro ang angkop, isang wikang pumanaw na. Mamarkahan ko lang rito, kung mamarapatin Ninyo, pero hindi ko po babahiran ng marurungis kong salita ang Inyong alaala.