A “Danse Russe” Thread, 2

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AN— i missed the internal rhyme, but yes, it's there. sleeping and sleeping and silken. it's the only proper noun there, and it's easy to think that it's got some weight
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AN— maybe his “average reader” and your “lonely scene” could put us on a slant as we decide what williams's “my household” is all about, what his mission in poetry involves, what his methods open up for us
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DE— This danse is no solo. The whole household participates. Even sleep is participation.
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DE— Getting a lot from this thread. What Kathleen means to me so far is that she's defining “household” as opposed to “family” which would be WCW, Flossie, the kids. That makes for totally different portraiture. It also makes the last lines quite resonant, seems to me the hour of “the happy genius” was only possible after everything's set up, everything's settled down, they're asleep, food will be served if they wake up, a man is free to dance as he wishes in his little yellow bubble as long as these conditions are preserved.
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AN— maybe putting the baby and kathleen together means he's putting her in its care?

Note on 106

Hi. Providing as asked, but referring to the two 30-student classes the last time I taught this. Distributed the Mayer list and asked them to bring their own dictionaries and a sonnet (four copies). Shared what I knew of the sonnet, then segued to an arc involving Dickinson's “Tell all the truth but tell it slant —” and Stevens's “Gray Room” and Waldrop's “Shorter American Memory of the Declaration of Independence,” all as prep for our sonnet-games.

Before tinkering with the sonnet though, I thought we could test-run the list and these were the exercises chosen:

* Write minimally: one line or sentence per day
* Write five short expressions of the most adamant anger; make a work out of them. 
* Write a work gazing into a mirror without using the pronoun I.

After we had gone through the sonnet and the arc of mini-discussions, we used the following exercises on the sonnets we brought to the basement:

* Take a traditional text like the pledge of allegiance to the flag. For every noun, replace it with one that is seventh or ninth down from the original one in the dictionary. For instance, the word “honesty” would be replaced by “honey dew melon.” Investigate what happens; different dictionaries will produce different results.
* Systematically eliminate the use of certain kinds of words or phrases from a piece of writing: eliminate all adjectives from a poem of your own, or take out all words beginning with 's' in Shakespeare's sonnets.
* Systematically derange the language: write a work consisting only of prepositional phrases, or, add a gerund to every line of an already existing work. 

Then I had them choose one more experiment from the list so they could work with that. We gathered reflections after this, shared our work, our experiences during the games. Some of that reflection was directed to (what I felt was) a provocative Mayer prescription: “Experiment with every traditional form, so as to know it.”

Huwag Idulog sa Akin ang Buong Katotohanan

ni Olav Hauge
aking salin

Huwag idulog sa akin ang buong katotohanan.
Huwag idulot sa akin ang dagat kung ako’y nauuhaw,
ni ang langit, sa paghingi ko ng liwanag;
ngunit magbitbit ng pahiwatig, kaunting hamog, isang katiting,
gaya ng mga ibong ilang patak lamang ang taglay mula sa tubig,
at ng hangin, iisang butil ng asin.

Madaling sabi

Pagbigyan sana kung uulitin ko lamang sa pagkakataong ito ang ilang mga nasabi na tungkol sa hulma ng “matulaing sanaysay” (“bakit hindi na lang tumula kung tutula, magsanaysay kung magsasanaysay?”). Patawarin ang ganitong paraan ng pagpapahiwatig.

Ani San Benito, “Walang bubulong-bulong, walang magsasalita—tinig lamang ng mambabasa ang maririnig doon.”

Monochrome Borealis

     of varying nationalities,
                    asking     gap between          in bridging – Kabunyan

          shot by     musicians
       
Working with the     Melody     (Outer
                                                  looks into     stems
         
formed in our
          hope)     piece, somehow it ended
         
piece          any concrete
                    you will receive